Block mates as we are, still we have to part ways as a semester ends. That's what differentiates college from high school; you can't around longer with people you just met. The next day, you get to meet yet another new friends then have new experiences--and mingle a lot.
Not such a bad thing about college huh?
...WRONG!
This is the first time I've ever experienced something like this. I come mid-way my school year, started to make new friends and actually feel comfortable with them and all in four months time, then...poof! Next thing I know, I'm introducing myself to strangers again.
Reshuffle - the term used in college body in which when a batch get all mixed up to make new set of classes for the new semester.
...and it sucks big time.
I hate it because I really like my section in which I belong to. Is that an enough reason? And I want to stick with my current classmates longer now that we're close enough to be identified as a class, unlike in our first days, wherein almost everyone has a certain group to belong to. We are just starting to have fun and the barriers between each one are broken down in a way that all are fine to mingle with anyone around. It's as if petty talks with anybody is nothing but of the mundane. It's good to think that you enter your class greeted by familiar faces that you all considered as friends, unlike well...otherwise.
As you can see, I'm not the friendly type. I don't like introducing myself just to gain friends. I rarely or never was the first time to approach someone even if I really wanted to be friends with people, because I need to feel comfortable first with the presence of a person before I make friends with them. I usually confine myself with only the people I know but given a school year being with the same people for ten months, eventually I get used with them or even, grew to like them. Ten months is merely enough, but four months? I don't think so.
I'm not looking forward to meet the rest of my batch mates for some reasons, not yet. I cannot tell the reasons as to why because it's a long story to tell how much I dislike them. Maybe, I'll talk about it on a separate entry. They hadn't done anything bad to me personally but generally they are very uncool and they suck bigger time. I can hardly imagine myself being with anyone like them. I feel doomed.
Nursing, being a female dominated course, is thankful to have a handful of guys (not to mention some cute ones, hehe). In our class, 17 are guys out of the 38 students. Outnumbered I see, but that's already a blessing if compared with other classes which only have 4 guys out of 40 students (no wonder in that section the girls are getting flirty). I studied in an all-girls school my entire life, and the more guy classmates, the better.
Cocky, to say that our class is the coolest, not because I'm comparing ours to others but because I'm way, way glad that I belong in which I do now. There's this class full of female nerds, having the majority of the teacher's pet in it. There's another full of
conyotic girls who have 5-inches of make-up in their faces. That's 'poisoning the well', I know, but that is what we have observed after all. I know other section are lacking of the cool people, but don't make me believe the rumors that some of my guy classmates were ambushed by girls in the hallway just to get their numbers. I heard also that most of my guys classmates are popular in other classes to the point that our professors knew all about the buzz. What's worst is, people taking pictures outside our classroom while we are in the middle of a lecture. Ill-mannered desperates...
However, the reshuffling thing is evitable. I heard telltales that our batch will only be reshuffled when the head administrator/s or professors in charge feel like it. Days after I heard it, our class was confronted by the first year adviser or--I dunno what to call him--after hearing complaints that our class is full of delinquents. He made a deal that if we behave as they wanted us to, the class will remain 'till March. Of course, we agree to it for none of us wanted to be reshuffled. We didn't behave however, but the reshuffling thing will happen nonetheless with the deal or none. So what's the point showing up in our class presenting a deal that is unlikely to happen? Is that another desperate measure to make us shut up? It's only an 'appeal to force'-- giving intimidation to produce agreeable results, it's ad baculum, it's a fallacy. Nobody complies with a fake deal. Good thing, we didn't.
...
Putting my hatred aside, the anticipation of the reshuffling process has saddened me greatly. Greatly enough that the sadness I feel is turned to loathing. I cannot afford to lose people I had already valued. The administrators have this ambition of a batch unity so it is necessary to reshuffle us every semester but a semester is not enough to build a good relationship within a class, let alone a batch. Now I believe that best moments in life are short-lived. I wish I didn't have fun for the last four months with them. I just wish I didn't so I could easily let go. This is not something to be included in prayers but I already prayed that it would not happen. I just don't want to, not now...
Currently listening to: Cancer - My Chemical Romance
Currently feeling: dramatic/morose/hopeless
